All I have is His

I have had a lot of time to myself the last two weeks as Dax & Teighe have been on a little vaca with their aunt, and the Lord knows that my teenagers are never home. So I have spent a lot of time doing whatever I wanted to do, and a lot of time listening for the still small voice of Jesus to whisper into those places that I have needed to hear Him, and for the rushing power of the Holy Spirit to pour out on me. Praise God that both things have happened and I feel so refreshed and renewed! Now, if only all of this could have happened by the sea. 😉

I have so many things that I want to write about, but the Lord keeps pressing me to share something that happened in our family just last week. I hope that our story gives you hope and joy and victory in those places that seem impossible to reach. God is faithful…

It was Monday, and the stress and anxiety of an incident that had happened with our oldest daughters boyfriend on Saturday still had me wound tight. Adam and I had spent countless hours on Sunday talking to our daughter about the incident, and all of the other things leading up to it that we had seen happening over the last year. We had counseled and given her every piece of advice we could give, we were worn out, the ball was now left in her court. On Monday, she would go to his house and talk to him about it, which honestly put another bee in my bonnet. He should have been running to her to fix the situation, but instead, once again she was running to him.

After she left, I started cleaning and praying… Lord, please don’t let her fall for his excuses. Please give her a voice. Please let her see her value through you, not through him. God, give her a man who unabashedly chases after you. God, give her a man who will put her second only to you. Father, give her a man who has integrity and good character. Give her a man who is respectful, and who is respected by those around him. God, give her a man who is a warrior, a provider, a strong tower. God, give her a man who will lead his family only towards you… That’s what I want for her God, that’s what I want for her God, That’s what I want for her God.

In tears I prayed and pleaded with God for a long time before He finally stopped me, and this is what He spoke to me.

You have been praying for the spouses of your children since before each of them were born. I have heard your prayers. Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours.

God went on with scripture after scripture reminding me that I don’t need to be fearful of the things I feel I have no control over, or the decisions that are out of my hands. If I have prayed for it, then I can be confident that if it is according to His will, he hears me and I will receive whatever I have asked him for.

Now, catch this because it’s POWERFUL!!! This was the boom, and I felt like I was walking with giants after God revealed this to me…


  • “THEREFORE!” When you come to a “therefore” in the Bible, you should check to see what it is THERE FOR! You see, the word tells us that what’s about to be presented is based on what’s already been said. The idea is, in view of the facts just given, here is a statement of conclusion that follows.)

I see what you did there God. Thank you! 😉


Only two things can happen in this situation. Either he is going to straighten up, and become the man that I have been praying for. Or, he is going to dig his own grave and the man that I have been praying for is going to come in and sweep her off her feet.

Boom! That’s it. Nothing to fear my friends. Remain in the confidence that you can approach the throne of grace with boldness so that you may find mercy, and the grace to help you in your time of need.

Be fierce and fearless in this grace filled life.



Giants in your way?

I don’t winter well… I refuse. I absolutely loathe winter and all that comes with it. The snow, the cold, the dead trees and drab scenery. So I just don’t. I don’t even own a coat, and yes, my flip flops stay out all year.

When the seasons start to change in the fall and the excitement of the holidays come knocking at my door I get excited for cooler weather, sweaters, boots, hot cocoa, baking and spending time with family reflecting on our many blessings and focusing on the birth of Jesus, then setting goals for the new year. But… As quickly as it comes and goes, is as quickly as I lose my excitement for the changing weather. When Christmas is over, I am done and I want the sunshine and beauty of summer back.

We set goals in the beginning of the new year hoping to create a better version of ourselves, thinking that if we could just change this or that about ourselves we would be happy or content. We fill up our lives with to do lists and to don’t lists. We overbook and over-schedule our lives so much that we leave no room for God to do what He wants to do in our lives. We fabricate a plan and a vision of what think we want our lives to look like, and then we either leave God out of it, or we present it to Him and tell Him that this is what we want, this is what we need. If He would only make your lives exactly like the picture we have drafted for Him, then we would be able serve Him well. We would be happy and content, and full of joy and peace. We would want for nothing more and we would be far better equipped to point others to Him. But, this is so basic…

The word of God says that we are created for more, we are created with a God given purpose, we are created for signs and wonders from the Lord almighty. But with our human brain we try to compartmentalize God, we put up walls inside our minds and try to put limits on a limitless God.

10 years ago, God spoke very plainly to me as I was standing in the bathroom of my parents house getting ready. I had just been through a divorce, and was staying with my parents who were so gracious to welcome me in. God told me in that moment that I was going to work in women’s ministry in a very big way and even gave me a visual to go along with it. At the time I scoffed at God and told him I was pretty sure He had the wrong girl. Didn’t He remember who I was? I was the girl that up until this point had never been successful at anything, in fact I’m pretty sure I had messed up more than I had ever accomplished and there was absolutely no way a wretch like me could ever become what the picture He put in my mind was. I walked away laughing, but also feeling sick to my stomach. Because more than anything did I wish that what I saw could be my life, but I had already failed at 30+ years of life so far and at this point I’m not getting any younger, so my life is going to be what it is, and I just need to accept that I could never be used in a might way by almighty God.

You see, I exchanged the truth of God for a lie. I tried to take my life out of the hands of God, I tried to tell the King of the World that He couldn’t use my life for His glory. The very God who created me from the dust, the one who has numbered my days, the one who knows every hair on my head; I tried to make small the infinite God, the one who holds it all, the one who has set in motion every moment of my life, the one who created me for a purpose that is so much bigger than I can even comprehend.

I had made what I perceived my life to be a giant standing between me and the life God had planned for me. But God is relentless in His pursuit of us, and as we surrender our will and what we think we need or want for His, the giant starts to fall and what seemed impossible is now possible.

What limits are you setting on God in your life? Have you designed a box for God and put His abilities in it thinking that where you have been or where you come from automatically disqualifies you from the life you were purposed to live? What giants are standing in your way?

Your purpose and your dreams do not have to be limited to what you think you can achieve based on what you see or where you fit in with the world. God owns it all! Tear down the walls you have built for Him, take Him out of the box, chase after what He has for you and watch your giants fall!

*Now to him who is able to do immesaurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be the glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations for ever and ever! Amen. -Ephesians 3:20

As a prisoner for the Lord, then, I urge you to live a life worthy of the calling you have received. -Ephesians 4:1




One Simple word…

I am a little behind on the new years resolution thing… Not that I didn’t come up with some things I would like to accomplish this year, just that I haven’t had the time to plan them out. With a new years resolution, most people “resolve” to become a better version of themselves, i.e. health, weight loss, being more organized, getting out of debt etc… Out with the old, in with the new right?

However, if you are anything like me, those resolutions quickly fade into the chaos of everyday life, and I eventually end up criticizing myself for my self imposed “failure” once again.

Which brings me to the point of this post. In order for us to be successful at anything we want to do, we must be committed and intentional. That’s why this year I have chosen one word that will keep me on track to achieving the things I really want to achieve.

Are you ready for it?… DELIBERATE

I need to be deliberate in all things.

  1. God: I need to be deliberate in my desperate pursuit of God and His word.
  2. Health: I need to be deliberate in the care of my body, I can’t lose weight or be healthy if I am not being deliberate about the things I am putting in it or being active.
  3. Unplugging: I need to be deliberate about putting my phone away and being present in my home. Picking up our phones and scrolling on social media has become a shocking habit that I am definitely guilty of.
  4. Time: What and who am I spending my time on? What gets the most of my attention? I feel like this one goes somewhat hand and hand with point number 3… I need to spend less time reading about other peoples lives and focus on my own. Also, I have a very hard time just letting the dishes or laundry go to spend time relaxing or laughing with my family. I need to be deliberate about just letting things go that will still be there later.

All of this comes full circle back to God. He needs to be first and foremost, he is the giver of all things and the sustainer of the strength and endurance I need to effectively live my life the way he designed it.


Are you strong enough….

So recently and I mean very recently my face ran full force into a God built brick wall. Why because I was not strong enough and didn’t make the choice to be so.

Now I sit here on the floor looking around at the damaged that I caused because of that wall that He so perfectly placed in my path. It’s amazing how with blinders of the flesh on we don’t want want to see what our choices are going to cause. 

Now I’m sure you are wondering why God put a wall up? Well to be honest it was because I wasn’t living like I was suppose to be. When I was home or at church I made at pretty good show that I was but thankfully we can’t hide things from God. I was living at a two face christian…. acting one way at home and church than another way at work.

I can say that we don’t see what’s happening but inside we all know all and that’s why I say we chose not to see it. But as I sit here God showed me this….

“Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart; I appointed you as a prophet to the nations.”

Jeremiah 1:5 NIV

So know all I can do is be thankful that He didn’t allow me to continue down the oath of my choices but to bring me back to him.

I want to share this with everyone to remind them how important our time with God is. Don’t be like me… never stop reading saying your tired or don’t have the time. Make the time and read when your not tired. Don’t say you can’t pray right now because right now is the time to be praying.  The armor that God gives us will never work if we don’t keep our face buried Him by reading His word, talking to Him and never stop hitting our knees. 

He is making it very clear that He is VERY jealous God and wants us close to Him at all times during our life.

For all who are allowing themselves to be led by the Spirit of God are sons of God. For you have not received a spirit of slavery leading again to fear [of God’s judgment], but you have received the Spirit of adoption as sons [the Spirit producing sonship] by which we [joyfully] cry, “ Abba! Father!”

ROMANS 8:14‭-‬15 AMP

So please be encouraged by my faults and failures to not go through it and if you have or are currently going through a hard time. Always remember to hit your knees if at the least daily and talk to your father. Let Him keep you strong in your faith and live a Godly life as we are called to be. Let’s forever never stop pursuing a relentless love for Christ. I pray this has helped….. And may God bless you on your journey. 

When Time Doesn’t Stand Still

My sister passed away a year ago today, and sometimes I still find myself wondering how time has went on and how have we continued to go through the mundane tasks of everyday life day after day without her here, when it seems like time should have just stood still.

I remember very vividly those moments shortly after she passed. I had arrived at her home with my parents just minutes after she took her last breath, and what transpired at that time felt like a scene from The Matrix. Everything felt like it was moving in slow motion as I watched my mother scream and wail “Oh baby girl, I was coming, I was coming, I was coming!” Over and over and over again. The immense pain that I witnessed was something I would never wish on anyone, and all I wanted to do was take it away from her. I watched helplessly as her heart was quite literally being ripped from her chest, as she cried out in agony with the sorrow I think only a mother who has lost a child could feel… Then, somehow miraculously, her motherly instincts took over, she stopped and composed herself, then very tenderly took the oxygen tubes from my sisters nose, turned off the machine and wept as she stroked the head of her first born child until her knees buckled beneath her.

As the day went on, and people came and went to pay their respects I kept thinking to myself “Why hasn’t everything stopped? Why are there still people driving by, and kids playing in their yards? Why don’t they stop? Don’t they know what just happened? Don’t they know that my big sister isn’t here with us anymore? Don’t they know that my parents just lost their daughter? Don’t they know that her husband just lost his wife of 40 years? Don’t they know that her kids just lost their mom, and her grandchildren just lost their grandma? Why isn’t time standing still? How can life continue to go on?” I kept trying to make sense of how and why things were still business as usual outside of the four walls we were contained in, I kept praying for God to reveal something to me that I could use and that I could lean on for comfort. Here is what he showed me…

Time is in His hands.We were created by Him and for Him, for a time and for a season. Our days were numbered before even one of them came to pass.

I still miss my sister terribly, and my heart still aches when I think of the loss that her husband, children and the rest of her family have suffered, but there is also a part of me that envies her entrance into the Heavenly realm where she now sits at the feet of Jesus and gets to look on His beautiful face. I know that pain, sadness, loss, sickness, stress, exhaustion and the ugliness of this world are no more for her. She has joy unspeakable, she is happy and beautiful, she dances and she sings and she is at peace.

When we had her memorial service, it was a packed house, there were people lined up out of the doors that had come to celebrate her life with us… I want to leave a legacy like that. Not for the fanfare, not to say that hundreds of people showed up to celebrate me, but to know that I have pursued and loved relentlessly every single day, every single person that God has placed in my life.

Our time, our lives are in His hands and he is always on time, even when we don’t understand why. We will not live a day longer than He has ordained for us, nor will we live a day shorter than He has allowed.

He is all knowing. He has a purpose and a plan for everyday of our lives, and I can’t wait until I get to see how all of the pieces of this crazy, wonderful, sometimes heartbreaking life fit together for His glory in the end.







Recently I have been observing our two teenage daughters and their personal walks with Christ. Our daughters know Christ, but seem to have put him on the back burner as of late. Replacing the time spent with him, doing other things. It has grieved my heart, and I prayed to God about it asking him why they don’t see the importance of putting him first, after all they are saved, they go to church, they live in a christian home and have christian boyfriends. God answered me in a way that made my mom heart drop to the pit of my stomach. He said this; “Because, they don’t have a testimony yet.”

As a follower of Christ, and as a seasoned veteran of the things that our testimonies are built out of, with tears in my eyes I thought “Oh Lord… I wish they didn’t have to.” But, they have to.

You see, our testimonies are made in those places of struggle and in those places of peace beyond our understanding. Our testimonies are built when we go through times of plenty and times of famine.Our testimonies are refined in those places of loss and heartbreak.  Our testimonies are strengthened in that place where we don’t have the courage to get up off of our knees because the pain is too much to bear. Our testimonies are discovered when God allows us to move to a place where we have always wanted to live, and then sends us back to our desert. Our testimonies are God in us, God with us, God before us and God beside us. They are the place where God is glorified because of His goodness, His mercy and His grace to us. At the end of the day, our testimonies are what sustain us.

As a mom, I pray that their testimonies will come easily, and that they won’t have to go through the seasons I have been through to get there. But I also know and trust that God has  purpose and plan for them that surpasses my human understanding. In the end He will be glorified through their testimonies, and that is what matters above anything I could ever hope for. After all, they belong to Him. I am just blessed to be their tour guide.




Happy wife, Happy life.. How to make that happen..

We have all heard the saying that a happy wife means a happy life but do we really understand what that means. I don’t think that we honestly do..

None of us really want to out in the effort to find out what it means it even what it takes to make a happy spouse. I know for me it was a very hard thing to figure out. It cost many discouraging moments, many headaches. Too many long night of fighting and that’s just a few things not including what it’s done to my wife.

It’s funny that once I found out what I really had to do in order for this to happen it was super easy for me. It’s not something that I could do not is it something you can do. It’s only when we realize that, can we finally find the secret to the best marriage you can ever have.

Are you ready….. Do you really want to know…. Well here it is I will tell you….

You have to love her through Christ and you have to do as the scripture says “we must die to our selves.” I had give up my battle and start pursuing her as though I am pursuing Christ. By doing this we are allowing God to love her through us. I have found that with all the different things that I have tried to better my relationship were all pointless unless I’m doing it with Him in my sights. Christ is where we find out joy through any hardship and also any joy we have in the good times can be better through Him.

So in turn with this new in sight I find my self longing for her in ways that I never knew a man could do. There is points when the aching to be with her is so intense that it causes such an emotion I get extremely anxious. Its the best feelings I have ever had, it’s being a whole new meaning to loving someone more every day.

So let’s remember that first love we have had for Christ can be a daily feeling you can have toward your spouse. Whether Your a husband or a wife it applies both ways. With doing this we find our satisfaction within Christ and stop holding our spouse to standards they can never achieve.

So in turn the answer is to never stop relentlessly pursuing the love of Christ.





Can you talk…

My question to everyone out there right now is can you speak? Can you speak out loud in a crowed place or quietly in your own mind? What about with your spouse or friends could you speak? I’m sure right now your thinking what kind of dumb question is that. When really it’s not dumb at all. I just removed all the excuses as to why you can’t speak with God.

It really doesn’t matter what form of communication you use to speak, as long as you can let’s talk with God.

Far too many of us my self included like to say that we can’t speak because we don’t know the words or we are not good with words. So how can I talk with God or to others about Him????

The answer is so simple that we miss it daily. When Jesus himself was here he was lacking one thing to start his ministry, and it’s the same thing we lack. Its AUTHORITY that is given to us by God.

When Jesus was baptized he received the Holy Spirit which have him the authority needed to do everything he did. So when we do the same and accept Jesus into our hearts as our Lord and Saviour, we now have the same authority…

So I think it’s about time we start exercising it in our lives. We have such a great power to start speaking God’s blessing into our lives. We need to speak love into our relationships with family and friends. Speaking Jesus Christ into others lives. Also to tell Satan to get behind us and that he has no control over us.

I pray reading this will help encourage you to dive into His word and use the authority given to us. God wishes we all are blessed and lives by Him so let’s start speaking it into our lives and no more negativity.

Remember to never give up the relentless pursuit of His love for you and let’s use it.








Glass House…..

Hey everyone,

It’s been along time since I have posted anything but I am back at it again. (hope that’s a good thing). I could go in to detail about how I ruined a family vacation, had a sister-in-law pass away, or ruined a one on one trip with my wife, or about being obedient to God selling off all our non essential stuff, cramming what was left into a little trailer to move to Oregon. but that would be really boring….

Instead I want to share with you about what God has shown me out of all of this….. Its all about becoming dead to your old self and turning into a glass house…

First off in order to truly die to ones old self can be a kinda hard for some. I found that for me it was hard, but it was because of me. I would refuse to see what Sherri always kept pointing our about my self and instead i would argue. Last night God showed me how He put her in my life to save me from a harder road. I was right on track of becoming just like a lot of my family… A controlling manipulating person.. I never saw how much I was like that till last night when I was no longer blind to it. We all need to stop being blind to what ever it is that God is trying to show us and clean up with in us. Take a second, read this bible verse… meditate on it… let it soak in… than earnestly ask God do show you how you have not been doing this………

 My son, pay attention to what I say;
    turn your ear to my words.
 Do not let them out of your sight,
    keep them within your heart;
 for they are life to those who find them
    and health to one’s whole body.
 Above all else, guard your heart,
    for everything you do flows from it.
 Keep your mouth free of perversity;
    keep corrupt talk far from your lips.
 Let your eyes look straight ahead;
    fix your gaze directly before you.
 Give careful thought to the[a] paths for your feet
    and be steadfast in all your ways.
 Do not turn to the right or the left;
    keep your foot from evil.

                                                 Prov. 4:20-27 NIV

When we can easily hide behind everything and anything that we can think of to avoid change or to make yourself believe that you are doing it. All we have to do is to honestly ask God to show us the heart He has for us and than take it. It will be hard because once you do it can reveal how bad your old one was. We also need to be repentive about it so we can take accountability for who we use to be so we can move on… That is to die to ones old self and become a new person.

Next its all about being a glass house……. Once we have let God in and replace our heart we need to maintain that by being transparent of who we use to be. By doing this we are not running any more from who we are because that person is dead… we are now embracing the new us and allowing everyone to see Gods mercy and love by letting them see in through the glass walls of where we came from and who God saved us from becoming.

Trust me and earnestly seek that new heart from Him now before too many things get messed up or worst of all miss out on the FULL blessings that God has for us.

Be relentless in the pursuit of God & your wife!

See you guys later…. Adam

Take a chance….

I just want to cut right to the point with this one. Have you ever heard the saying “Happy wife, happy life”? … Well, it’s not true, knowing Jesus is the only thing that can bring true happiness, but letting your wife know how much you love and adore her can certainly make life that much more enjoyable.

If you have not read my wife’s last post titled “Stop Taking Notes On His Mistakes”, then you need to go read it. It is something that we men can apply too. If any of you have kept track of mistakes that your wife has made then you need to stop. I never really kept track of the mistakes, I more so held on to the feelings it would cause when she would bring them up. Things like, “You’re not perfect either” or “Don’t forget to blame your self for this fight too”, just to name a few of them. Or maybe you fall under the category of the guy who feels like there is nothing wrong with your relationship for the most part, everything is good. If that’s the case, just because you feel that way does not mean your wife feels the same way, and she might just feel like there are a few things that could use some improvement. (Ouch… I know)

So, here is a challenge I want to throw at you……..

A few weeks ago, I watched a video interview of an elderly couple who had been married for 27 years or so. During their interview, the biggest thing that jumped out at me was that the husband wrote his wife a note every morning before leaving the house and continued to do so after he had retired, everyday for the entire time they were married. In fact I think he continued on until the day he died. I just kept thinking of how much he must have loved her to make it a point to write her a note every single day and all of the ways that simple act had impacted their marriage.

I want you to challenge you to take a chance and see what could happen in your own marriage. Take the next two weeks or if you want to really step it up take the next four weeks to show your wife a new side of you.

Write her a note every day, it could be in the morning or evening depending on your schedule. Talk to her about something remarkable she did very recently, or something coming up that you are looking forward to doing with her, thank her for everything she does for you and your family, or let her know all of the ways you love her even still, or use it as a way to tell her something amazing that you have noticed and love about her.

The whole point is to show you that your relationship can be more than you ever imagined. In two weeks of doing this, you will definitely start to see each other growing closer together. Like I said, if you want to step things up and really WOW her, go for the full four weeks or beyond. I have been doing it now for two weeks and it really is helping draw my wife and I closer together. Even if you really do feel like your relationship is good, try it and see what happens, you won’t be disappointed. The best of relationships will notice a change for the better.

In my previous posts, I have listed a few different things that you can Incorporate into this challenge that could really help ignite a new flame in your marriage. I want you to know that if you accept this challenge, I will extend the offer to walk beside you personally to help encourage you if the going gets rough or you need a little help.

Lets step up as men, and make an impact on marriage. Lets get back to that first love we had for our wives. The institution of marriage and family is falling by the wayside at an alarming rate, and I believe that we have the ability to turn things around. For ourselves, for the future of our children, for their children and so on down the line. Marriage is a sacred covenant established by God. Lets stop letting it seem like a burden and treating it as something disposable. We have the power to take back the things that are important to us. We have a God that is bigger than any trial we might be going through, even if your marriage seems to be at a point where it can’t be saved, God is still on His throne and He still has a plan… We just have to surrender control and let Him lead.

How many of you want to step up and take this head on? You can comment below, send me an email or hit me up on Facebook, I would love to hear how it goes for you and what sort of impact and change it makes in your marriage. I hope to see a lot of guys who are willing to take their relationship up a notch and take back the love they once shared with their wife before the chaos of life got in the way.

Please don’t hesitate to hit me up if you need me to stand with you in prayer for your relationship with God, your wife, your marriage or your family.

Be relentless in the pursuit of God & your wife!

See you guys later…. Adam